The oldest memories I have are mostly filled with you,
Cotton dress starched and ironed, apron too, the same.
Washing, ironing, sweeping, mopping, fixing lunch, cooking dinner,
Finding time to rub my head, smile at my accomplishments,
kiss my boo-boos, and set me right when I had done wrong.

Time went by, I grew up, you grew older too.
As is the way with life it seems, we go our separate ways.
Separated by miles and space, but bonds of the heart hold strong,
We lived our lives as years went by, occasionally visiting,
talking on the phone.
Always bonded heart and soul as a mother and her son.

You were always there if I needed to talk, or just wanted to say hello.
Answering always on the second ring with your familiar.."hello".
We would talk and laugh and pass the time, catching up on all the news.
Touching hearts, renewing bonds, drawing strength...
you to me....me to you.

Being, as we were, so much alike, sparks would sometimes fly,
But never long did flaring tempers hold us in their icy grip.
The bonds were strong, the roots were deep, so much alike were we.
Again, though stretched, the bonds would heal, rejoining....
A mother and her son.

I remember most your strength, how you always held your head high.
Unwavering in your beliefs, you were the rock of our family.
Through the loss of a daughter, my sister, so sweet and fair,
Your strength was there for all of us; yet never a tear I saw.
But even so, I know, that behind closed door you cried and prayed,
And then you cried some more.

Over the years, you touched so many lives,
brought so much happiness to others.
Deeds and things you had done from heart so good and kind.
Always going behind the scenes....never looking for praise or thanks,
But knowing, as you believed, rewards would come in heaven.

Into your life, the ravening sickness came,
without warning and from out of the blue.
The mammogram had shown a lump, "not to worry", the doctor said.
The biopsy next, the lab's report, the operation that followed...
All designed to save your life, but fate can be so hollow.
Chemo followed.....and six months later....................

The chest x-ray had shown spots on both lungs--
and more chemo after that.
Your strength came out, as I knew it would....and you bore it all.
Still unwavering in your faith, you said, "God's will, not mine be
done, your statement, your prayer, your all.
Hollow fate had one more surprise, as the monster devouring you moved
in......into bone.

Through all the pain, the sickness, the horror of it all,
Never did I hear you complain; you gritted teeth and used your
strength to take you through it all.
With mercy, finally, on July 12, 1995, the angels came and took you home....
To see your daughter, your father, your God, and others gone before.

The hole left by you in my heart has still not fully healed.
I still expect, when I call home for your voice, on the second ring,
to answer and say "hello":
I know you're happy and where you want to be,
and never in my selfishness would I wish you back.....to stay,
But the little boy deep inside me who still feels lost and alone
Would love to feel, just one more time......
A hug from his mother to her son.